The bond between siblings is a mysterious one. In this post, we try to unravel it and understand the undercurrents that make the relationship between siblings stronger and/or turbulent.
It is said that if you have a sibling, you will always have a friend. As idealistic as it may sound, those who have siblings know that it is not entirely true. Having a sibling also means sharing your things and space, wearing hand-me-downs, getting less of everything and constant bickering. Unlike other relationships that require initiation at your end, having a sibling
is truly a gift.
Two souls are born of the same parents and share a beautiful unspoken bond. There is an unseen flow of love between them. It may not be apparent in our day-to-day lives but when it is time to celebrating an important life event or a time of need, our sibling is perhaps the first one that we think of.
Love is never lost
According to Bert Hellinger, father of Family Constellation therapy, the sibling line gets distorted in case the couple goes through a miscarriage. It is therefore important to give each conceived child the place it deserves as per the sequence.
Love between siblings is a given yet we often see cases of extreme hatred between them. There could be long standing feuds over property and distribution of wealth. There might be even be misunderstandings over minor issues that get blown out of proportion. This happens when the dynamics between siblings is disturbed by untoward incidents.
In one’s rightful place
In earlier times, miscarriages were common as birth control was not freely available. When each conceived baby is given its due place in the sequence of birth within a family, the flow of love from one sibling to another goes unhindered. An elder brother or sister might feel the need to be a parent to the younger sibling or at the other extreme, he/she might get
insecure after the birth of the younger one. These extreme emotions will create sibling rivalry or an imbalance of power within the family’s hierarchy.
While it is a good thing for elder siblings to look after the younger ones, they should not take over the responsibilities of the parents. If each child is at his/her rightful place, such issues will not arise. The bond between siblings will grow and strengthen over time and they will rely on each other for help and healing.
As per energy dynamics, since siblings share the same parents, their bonding is quite strong and they always stand up for each other. That is not to say that they won’t have disagreements or quarrels but if their bond is strong they will always come back to each other for support and believe in facing life together.
Very well said…